If you’ve spent any time on my website, listened to the podcast, or followed Teen Savvy Coaching on social media, you’ve probably noticed the butterfly.
People occasionally ask why I chose it as the logo for a business that helps parents of teens and tweens.
The answer is simple.
Adolescence is one of life’s greatest periods of transformation, not just for kids, but for parents, too.
Like a butterfly emerging from its chrysalis, teenagers are growing into themselves. They’re developing new abilities, questioning old assumptions, stretching toward independence, and discovering who they want to become. At the same time, parents are navigating a transformation of their own. They are learning how to gradually loosen their grip while remaining a steady source of guidance, safety, and connection.
Helping a child grow metaphorical wings requires patience, courage, flexibility, and an environment where growth can happen. That’s exactly the work I love doing with families.
So yes, the butterfly is a symbol of growth and transformation.
But for me, it also tells a much more personal story.
The Butterflies I Grew Up With
I believe I inherited my love of butterflies from my mother.
Growing up, butterflies were everywhere in our home. They appeared on wallpaper, stationery, pillows, quilts, and countless decorations. My mother was an incredibly talented fabric artist, and butterflies seemed to find their way into many of the beautiful things she created.
If I was ever looking for a gift for her, I knew I couldn’t go wrong if it had a butterfly on it.
Our relationship, however, wasn’t always simple.
Like many mothers and daughters, we loved each other deeply while sometimes struggling to understand one another.
My mom’s childhood was difficult, and some of those unfinished experiences found their way into her marriage, her parenting, and our relationship. At times she could be emotionally needy. At times her words could sting. Her emotional state often shaped the atmosphere in our home.
But that’s only part of the story.
She was also one of the smartest people I’ve ever known. She loved to laugh. She cared deeply about the people in her life and genuinely wanted to know what was happening with them. She never missed an opportunity to cheer for my sister or me, whether it was in school, on the athletic field, or later in our careers.
Like all of us, she was wonderfully human.
The Beginning of Teen Savvy Coaching
My mother died unexpectedly in February 2021 after a devastating fall.
Because of the COVID-19 pandemic, we hadn’t seen each other in many months. Her death came just as the idea for Teen Savvy Coaching was beginning to take shape, although it would be another year before I officially launched the business.
I often tell parents that their hearts walk around outside their bodies.
I believe that’s true.
And although my relationship with my mom was complicated, I know her heart is still with me. Somewhere, I like to think she’s still cheering me on.
Because that’s what parents do.
They cheer for their children.
Sometimes imperfectly. Sometimes awkwardly. Sometimes in ways their children don’t fully recognize until much later.
But they keep cheering.
What the Butterfly Means Today
When you see the butterfly in the Teen Savvy Coaching logo, I hope you’ll think about transformation.
Not just the transformation of teenagers into young adults, but the transformation of parents who are learning alongside them.
I hope you’ll think about relationships that are beautifully imperfect. About families that repair after conflict. About the courage it takes to grow, to change, and to stay connected through every stage of life.
Every family has its own story.
Every parent-child relationship has its own twists, challenges, and moments of grace.
The butterfly reminds me that growth is rarely linear, relationships are never perfect, and love has an extraordinary capacity to endure through change.
If you’re parenting a tween, teen, or young adult right now, I hope you’ll remember this:
Even when it feels messy, growth is happening.
For your child.
And for you.
And that, to me, is what the butterfly has always represented.
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