The Power of Play: Why Adults Need It Just as Much as Kids

When you think about play, do you picture a bunch of kids running around, laughing, and making a mess? Maybe a game of tag, a pile of Legos, or an intense round of hide-and-seek?

What if I told you that you need play just as much as your kids, especially as a busy, overworked, slightly stressed-out adult?

In a recent episode of Parenting Shrink Wrapped, we sat down with TJ Matton, LCSW-C, a psychotherapist and coach who specializes in adult play. Yes, you read that right—adult play. And no, this isn’t about playing make-believe with your kids or forcing yourself into a game of Monopoly you don’t want to play. This is about something much deeper—something that can actually transform the way you parent, work, and handle stress.

Are You Play-Deprived? Here’s How to Tell.

According to TJ, play isn’t just for kids—it’s a biological necessity for people of all ages. But in today’s productivity-obsessed world, most adults are play deprived. And the symptoms? They show up in ways you might not expect:

✔️ Feeling overwhelmed by everyday tasks (everything feels like a chore)
✔️ Struggling to be flexible (rigid thinking, needing control)
✔️ Burnout and exhaustion (your brain never gets a real break)
✔️ Lack of joy in daily life (When was the last time you did something just because it was fun?)

If any of this sounds like you, it might be time to rethink what you know about play.

Play Isn’t Just an Activity—It’s a Mindset

One of the biggest misconceptions about play is that it’s something you do. We think of play as an event—a game of soccer, a craft project, or a trip to the playground. But TJ explains that play is actually a state of being.

Play is about engagement, curiosity, and enjoyment for its own sake. It’s about losing yourself in an activity without worrying about the outcome. It can be anything from dancing in your kitchen to solving a puzzle to simply letting yourself wonder.

What’s Your Play Personality? Find Out Here.

Not all play looks the same, and understanding your play personality can help you reconnect with it in a way that feels natural. According to TJ, there are three main play types:

1. The Structured Player (Type One)

Do you love puzzles, board games, and activities with a clear goal? Do you prefer structured hobbies like knitting, baking, or building things according to a plan? If so, you’re likely a Type One Player.

2. The Free Spirit Player (Type Two)

Do you enjoy wandering in nature, doodling in a notebook, or experimenting in the kitchen without following a recipe? You might be a Type Two Player, someone who loves open-ended, exploratory play.

3. The Thrill-Seeker (Type Three)

Do you chase adrenaline? Love spontaneity? If skydiving, rock climbing, or trying something completely new excites you, you’re probably a Type Three Player.

Knowing your play style can help you bring more fun into your life in a way that actually works for you.

How Play Reduces Stress and Helps You Parent Better

Play is more than just fun—it’s a powerful tool for reducing stress and improving mental health. When we engage in play, we:

💡 Improve problem-solving and creativity
😌 Boost emotional regulation (goodbye, constant frustration)
🤝 Strengthen relationships (including with our kids!)
💖 Experience more joy and connection in daily life

For parents, play can be a game-changer. But here’s the surprising part: TJ recommends starting with YOURSELF, not your kids.

Why You Should Play for Yourself First (Before Your Kids)

Many parents assume that bringing more play into family life means playing more with their kids. But TJ warns that if you’re stressed, exhausted, and overwhelmed, trying to force play into parenting can actually backfire.

Instead, she suggests starting with your own play. Find something that lights you up—just for you—and let it become part of your daily life. When you start playing again, your joy will naturally spill over into your family life.

How to Add More Play to Your Life (No Extra Time Required!)

If the idea of adding one more thing to your already packed schedule makes you want to scream, don’t worry—play doesn’t have to be time-consuming.

Try these simple ways to incorporate more play into your day:

🎶 Turn on music while cooking or cleaning—and dance a little
💦 Wash your hands in the perfect temperature water (yes, really!)
🧩 Do a puzzle, build something, or try a new hobby—even if you’re bad at it
🚶‍♂️ Go for a walk without a destination—just to wander
😂 Try something new that makes you laugh

The key is to start small. Play doesn’t have to be scheduled or structured—it just has to be enjoyed.

Final Thoughts: Play Your Way to a Happier, Healthier Life

Play isn’t just for kids, and it’s definitely not a waste of time. It’s a powerful, research-backed way to boost your mental health, reduce stress, and even parent better.

So, what’s your play personality? And how will you bring a little more play into your life today?

🎧 Want to learn more? Listen to the full conversation with TJ Matton on our latest Parenting Shrink Wrapped episode! Click here to listen now.